It's been so long. Even with so much to write I don't have the effort to type. This past little while has been filled with a whirlwind of emotion. I'm head over heels in love yet I feel like my family life is tearing me apart. I long so badly to be older and have a family of my own but I also know that I am not ready. I wonder when I will know that I'm ready and how I will know. He knows I'm not ready and I wonder if he will know when I am. He's my bestfriend, one that I know will last forever. It's so wierd to feel more mature than your parents. It's how I've felt for a long time. I guess it really is love that will keep things together.